Am not saying that I am envied or what...
Everytime I logged on, will start seeing someone posting regarding passing their exams la, how fast they finished their exams la, how they deal with the exam la, how stress working in a hospital la, this la that la...
Me, still going through my life in my own pace but no doubt I got a bit heated up... Why???
One: I freaking requested to work in a hospital, but some idiot behind that fucking computer decided to screw my life by chucking me in a community clinic... Sick of being called stupid when we referred case to the hospital... Reason why I choose Anaest in my 6th posting is that I dun really like to refer cases... I really hope I can do my best for the patient instead of pushing the case to someone else... But I had no choice now but to refer the case even though I know my diagnosis is right and I know what to do to save the patient's life... But I referred to the hospital, hoping that they can do what I can't do... But in the end, my words were taken lightly, patient died... Damn it... Not even a single test done to rule out my diagnosis!!! Damn you arrogant guy... In the end patient died!!! And you blame the patient being promiscuous... No confirmation... At least an echo or CT... Even a Fucking ABG also dunno how to interpret!!! Damn you...
Two: bosses being bosses and being a retarded politician... Talking nonsense, pressing clinicians do something that should not be done... Retens, and statistics were your main job... And fucking our life is your part time job... Trying your best to break and conquer... Damn hate... Have a specialist in my clinic, so what??!! "He is our boss. Sometimes we need to kowtow to him even though we know it is nonsense!!" What the fuck is this!!!!! Kowtow to his nonsense?? What is this!!! We have our justifications on our decisions... What's your problem?? Just because we notified a "celebrity" case, and maybe fucked up your figure, thus we are not doing our job right!!! What the fuck is all this???!!! You wasted 5 years of med school, wasted the 2 years as a house officer, and wasted another 2 years or more as a medical officer.... I felt like quitting... Damn you...
Three: ask kena diao, dun ask kena diao also... So what you want... Dunno la...
We used to work in a peaceful environment... Until you came... 2 of you came... Since then chaos reign... Felt like even the healthcare system is compromised, and as a member in the system, I am speechless...
But one thing... I have my dearest with me... Despite her working a bit further away from my place.. We got to see each other everyday... I got to cook for her everyday... I got to make her angry everyday... And I got to make her smile everyday also...
I am really sorry because as you said I am not a romantic person... I dun know how to express myself.. I pissed you off all the time... But I really love you... Really really love you... I am trying my best to be a better man... Doing my best...
Peace out tonight... See ya tomorrow morning when you open your eyes... Muacksss... Love you...
Got to go fight with life to be one of the fittest for the purpose of survival.. Hehe...
